You're Too Nice To Work In HR

I once bought a hilarious going-away cake for an employee that everyone loved except HR.

She was moving out of state. I liked her, we had a good relationship, and our banter was always sharp. On her last day, someone asked me to pick up the going-away cake. So I asked the baker to write this “Happy Trails. You’re Dead To Us.”

I thought it was hilarious. Most people thought it was hilarious.

HR saw a baked-in lawsuit.

HR escorted me into a closed-door meeting and laid into me in the nicest possible way. They asked me to imagine how dumb “You’re Dead To Us” would sound in a lawsuit, under oath.

HR was not judging my intent. They were judging how it could be received, photographed, and used later by someone who did not know the relationship behind the joke.

And they were right.

Luckily, she called in sick on her last day, so the cake never became evidence.

The best HR people smile for a living. Underneath, they are equal parts psychologist, compliance officer, and lawyer — with better people skills.

Business owners, do not hire nice HR people and then punish them when they draw a hard line.

They are not always killing the fun. Sometimes they are keeping you out of court.

Nice is the packaging.

Fair is the product.